Unthinkable (I'm Ready)

So yesterday I downloaded the new Alicia Keys album, THE ELEMENT OF FREEDOM! I have been heavily rotating this one song, "Unthinkable"ft Drake. I find this love song to be so moving and in the moment which I love. The beat, the tone, and her voice is all beautiful! I am not really a routine kind of person, and I can feel the passion in the song about just being real and taking risks when it comes to love, it's not typical.
I can just feel the love in the song and I can definitely relate to it.
It speaks Beauty and Love, Thanks Alicia for blessing my ears today!

BETTER WAKE THE FUCK UP CAUSE WE'RE NOT HERE TO SLEEP

I MUST HAVE ALL THREE!

Picture

The anxiety is bruising my chest with the hughes
of painting short breath
Because I find it strikingly disturbing that we are taking choice for granted
The minute we stop questioning authority is when we lose our humanity
Don't be afraid to step outside that cardboard box they sold your soul in called assimilation
Remember that you have a voice to yell
not fortune cookies for eyes, there isn't a set destiny here
Do something if you wanna see change
The picture isn't always black and white, So try to see those greys make us special
The fact that we don't know sometimes prove that we have thought
A hung jury proves deliberation
A trap can only produce strategy
And this piece is fruit for thought
Sorry if this seems like a pointless rant
But I'm letting my thoughts walk on broken glass not eggshells

KNOWLEDGE IS POWER, IGNORANCE WILL NOT MAKE IT GO AWAY!

TODAY AT MY COLLEGE, THE AWARENESS FOR WORLD AIDS BEGAN WITH A PROGRAM IN HENDRIX THEATER HOSTED BY A PANEL OF INFECTED HIV AND AIDS MEN AND WOMEN OF DIFFERENT AGES. I FOUND THEIR STORIES TO NOT ONLY BE REAL BUT VERY POWERFUL. ALTHOUGH MOST STUDENTS WERE THERE TO GET CREDIT FOR THEIR HEALTH CLASS I WAS THERE TO REALLY LEARN AND TAKE IN WHAT THEY HAD TO SAY , AND I HOPE OTHERS WALKED OUT WITH AT LEAST HALF OF THE EXPERIENCE.

THE YOUNG MEN STOOD OUT TO ME PARTICULARLY NOT JUST BECAUSE OF THEIR YOUNG AGE BUT THEY WERE STRIKINGLY HANDSOME AND ONE WOULD NEVER KNOW. I COMMEND THEM ON THEIR BRAVERY TO STAND IN FRONT OF HUNDREDS OF STUDENTS AND SAY THEY WERE HIV AND AIDS INFECTED. I DON'T THINK I WOULD HAVE HAD THE SAME COURAGE.

SO IF YOU ARE A FOLLOWER OF MY BLOG PLEASE WALK AWAY WITH THIS MESSAGE, GET TESTED AND EDUCATE YOURSELF, KNOWLEDGE IS POWER AND IGNORANCE WILL NOT MAKE IT GO AWAY, BE SMART AND HELP SPREAD AWARENESS TO YOUR FAMILY AND PEERS ABOUT WORLD AIDS DAY!

My Daughter

Is it Better to Be Mixed Race?

This video is very interesting, It looks at and explores racial differences, implying that there may also be an advantage in being mixed race. I find this to be very controversial, In Hitler's was suggested, blonde hair and blue eyes were superior, and this video suggests that mixed race people may be genetically better off.

Through the interviews there is a constant battle whether or not this is research that should be done, very controversial. There are so many different people in the world, but as the video said, we are still a young species, so the difference is still very small, although evident.

Another thing they mentioned was the different diseases among communities, I personally believe that statistics like these further separate us and make it impossible to look past difference between.
Take a look and comment what you think of this???

"Rated R"

Rihanna,WOW, I truly find this woman to be amazing. From her style to her undeniable talent she took the stage in London and killed it! I love her wardrobe and whole set of the performance. Her new dark side has come out and I think she is so strong and shining through now more than ever through her music. She come come across so many success and it's crazy to think we are about the same age, You go Ri-Ri!

"WOW TIME "-Subway

Our roots are like fossils buried into the core of this
World, I have been carbon dating my culture back to the
Blueprints of poets who have always existed
Because they did more than just exist
Yet we have never done more than just be
But I find my grandmother’s blood on the spray
Painted walls that you call vandalism
Tagged subway trains and brushed slang on the tongues
Of the city, who feared to speak in public
Because their silence has bought them sacred pride
Our flags gave us identity, so we sew them on to our
chest like the scarlet letter for our countries in America
Our appetite started boiling this recipe for the melting
Pot too long and now the kitchen is getting crowded,
Ethnic Evolution has made us beautiful
But their ugly fears have

Gave us struggle, we are stereotyped like book shelves,
Our history can sometimes be found in fiction
But our truth is riding on the backs of
Bilingual tongues and we are mixing up their kids
The reason separation of races will cease by 2050
Until then we will keep finger painting that sky
Leaving our prints for the world to look up
And earth will look at like a proud mother
For making her planet beautiful, remember your roots!

Invented Sex?

So, This video is hot in the streets right now, definitely a boner. I always though Trey was sexy, now I see that he is just a damn freak, which works for me lol, but I also adore the girl in the video too because she seems obtainable, he didn't get some small waisted, big ass redbone that is unrealistic, which says something about him as well, maybe the average girl works for him.

Bad Romance

Lady Gaga, I believe is a rising icon. I love her style, weirdness, and I don't give a fuck vibe. She is so unique is something that I think the industry is not used to, people fear what they don't comprehend, So I think the critics and haters just motivate to keep doing her thing. You go Gaga!!!!!!!!

Despite the heaven you came from,I will continue to believe that you were made in the face of the stars, because the planets in my nerves have never aligned until I saw your smile, and my hip hop song never had the perfect beat, that''s where you're heart comes in, He told me it was a spaceship, that's why sometimes I seem to be living in the clouds, jumping those cotton balls like hop skotch, Our love is Intergalactic.

Surround myself with Artists

Yesterday afternoon I sat down with a fellow poet from our organization and had the best conversation I have ever had with someone, for like 4 hours, Tipsy Teapot had to kick us out.

What I learned is that I can always rely on a fellow artist to understand this weird ass mind of mine. I always thought that my imagination, mind and thoughts were pretty absurd, but it's just that I haven't been able to link up with people here who understand my weirdness or where my personality and mind set comes from. I just want to thank her for vibing with me, Gave me inspiration that there are people around me that I can come to when I want to get away from the normal ones.

I just want my imagination to explode sometimes and paint the school with it like graffiti art sometimes, and I feel so inhibited in fear of judgement, I just hope to grow out of that and be fearless and take minds by storm with my words.

My hip hop song never had the perfect beat
That is where your heart comes in
He told me it was a spaceship,
That's why sometimes I seem to be living in the clouds
Jumping those white cotton balls like hop-skotch
The planets in my nerves have never aligned until I saw your smile
This solar system of a man shuttled my soul into a meteor shower
And I had my airbags ready cause this was nothing new
I wonder what he would do
If I got down to my knees
Told him that those rumbling bees
In my belly now buzzes for the honey of another
Because my song now sings to the meter of another mans poem.

New Piece...Keep Revising

Baseball was more than sport
It spelled freedom in capital letters
And his travel to the U.S. was visible from left field in Boca Chica, DR
Literally not having a pot to piss in
Papi could play and he had a dream
Taking his Caribbean tan and patched gloved hands, he played baseball
Never forgetting where he came from
Papi cultivated his agricultural roots as dark as sugars canes
Still leaving a sweet tooth for those growing pains
Stinging like the fresh burn from a 3rd degree heartbreak
Family was never more than a sport
It spelled abandonment in capital letters
And his daughter’s smile was visible from left field of his living room
Literally not having a heart to love
His calling to be a man was an ignored alarm clock, He loved that snooze button
Had a barbaric view of what it is to be man, because it doesn’t stop at bringing home the bacon
And could never say he was proud, his primitive upbringing wouldn’t understand
So I eventually just stopped telling him that I loved him everyday
That my grades were good and I had a track meet Saturday
He was slowly dying
Passion was the first to go
Losing that campfire inside that burned like the acid of a bulimic’s stomach, purged
He was pathetic,
Then he lost his sight, no goals ahead the savage in him made him blind
My body became brail,
He was my excuse for teenage heartbreak because the guy I liked took the face of his
He turned my heart into a glacier and I just wanted to melt his
But I will not allow you to be the reason I don’t believe in love, family, or life
Because despite what my father was the only thing I see of him in me
Is my amazing ability to get a good tan this summer and oh yea thanks for the curly hair too!

My heart is still

My bones are shivering
My veins are quaking
My heart is still
The meteor shower of brain sent fireworks down my spine
The whole time while this is happening My heart is still
My stomach has summer salted into winter
begging for the leaves to fall again
And the world is begging for reason to keep turning
So tattooed to pain, my eyes are begging to reason to cry
and while this going on my heart is still

It's Been a While....

School is stressful but keeps me very busy which is good! I am so focused and motivated to succeed this year in my education, dreams, and poetry.

I am also still loving my boyfriend Darren everyday more and more. This past week we got into our first real bad argument, almost a deal breaker. But the way that we handled and talked about it proves to me more and more why he is the one.
I loved him more after 48hours of hating him. We are so strong and am so proud of what we are both doing.

So I was recently inspired by a peer to go after my goal at the age of 25, now at 19. One if my dreams is to open up an education center for emancipated foster children as well as a shelter for them. Just because I can relate to their situation and know the importance of someone being there. I want them to have the same opportunity I did to go to college.

This weekend I am heading out to Fayetteville with Coco to get away and attend a social in Pembroke! I am excited and ready to stop thinking about Chemistry for once =)

JUST NOTEPADDING:


Her phone doesn't ring as often as it used to
and the night never seemed so dark when she went to sleep
Her heart became a spaceship, out of this world
Only humans who can live intergalacticly can come in contact
She was just that special
A blind man could see more than met the eye
but Marley didn't know better
She forgot she had gold between her legs.

:all she ever wanted to do was write poetry
yet she spread her legs like wings
hoping that the heavens were in sight
she forgot that gold lies there
Using the pen as a can because she was crippled from the mind down

CultureTribe.

I want to bring my reader's attention to this website.
Go here if you want to be cultured and educated with knowledge and what is real. They have also given me a feature for my work as well as a recurring feature on their site weekly. Doing big things, so go ahead and be a part of the movement!

Go there: http://culturetribe.wordpress.com/

Hearts that beat together stay together...

This amazing man above is the special guy in my life. The picture above is my favorite of us, taken in 2007 in my drive way around November! He is my heart, my love, my sanity, my everything! He isn't a poet but appreciates my creativity, we wrote this short piece together, and It reminds me every day why he is the one for me, I love you Babe!



"I need you more...than a heart beat
Our love is like...shooting stars, but never dies
When we're apart....I'm only half the person I should be
the chemistry i feel between us....is magic, people think it doesn't exist
Sometimes I wonder if...why I don't wonder, your smile says it all
When we hold eachother...the heavens sing, and my heart erupts
Simply put....I love you
AWWWW\"

HERstory...

I want to dedicate these next couple of weeks or months to researching my HERstory and where I come from. My nationality is something that my family has always embraced, but I need to know more. I consider myself to be a bi-racial Latina. My mother is from Chile (appears white) and my dad is from Dominican Republic (appears black). Their histories are totally opposite, yet I have managed to embrace both sides and wear my flags with pride. From what I have read, Dominicans are descendants and relatives to Slaves from Africa as well as Haitian (right next door). I believe that we all originate form th motherland, but I want to get specific. As far as my Chilean side I have acquired from family members who are older that are roots lie in Italy and Germany (explains my mother's side of the family's appearance). So I am very intrigued to see what runs through my blood to pump this culture of mine...I feel a piece coming on!

PUT SOME NEW FLAVOR IN YOUR EAR......

Very good friend of mine, known him since back in days lol...actually went to highschool together and this man is very D0pe. Not only is he taking over with his crazy lyricism but educating through music as well. Take some time for something different and support the mixtape download and the whole Lazaretto Crew...LLTK

Follow this link:
http://www.thelazaretto.com/downloads.html

Experience

Today I have realized just how numb this heart of mine really is
I can no longer tell the difference between self inflicted pain and the pain I inflict onto other that I "Love"
I can no longer tell the difference between a man's hands and a man's heart
How do I filter?
I have managed to mixed those memories I no longer wish to revisit with those that are there to help
Fuck me over once, I will fuck the whole world over by not letting it in, is how I feel!
It's one thing to learn something, but how do I unlearn,
How do I untwist the agony that lives in my throat crying wolf
yelping for pain because it's all that I know
All I know is the weakness in me, and well for the strong part, I am not worthy
I have not suffered enough, Sick??? Yes, how I am? True. Do I want to change? I don;t know!!!!!!!!!
That is what I fear. I fear that I have not learned the boundaries a little girl was robbed of, they are lost in guilt and shame, and only found by pain, and hurt, and tears
I am still waiting for the day that I can tell my story without feeling I am giving birth through my mouth, then and only then will I know I have forgiven myself and my predator. I have been a prey for too long and I have yet to reach out to that little girl and show her who she is now, show here that I will never let anyone hurt her again.



Forgive me for I have not learned the boundaries of this imagination of mine
I follow her everywhere, day and night!
I stalk her like the lover i never had and the woman I though I could never be.
She tell me tales, naming every synonym possible for pain
She talks tears and hear blood
and I show her strength
I give her light and build the bricks of her path
I help her with homework
and teach her about boys, tell her they are not worthy of your throne and no one will ever love you as much as I
No one will every hold your heart as tight as I ....

KANYE AND AMBER

THESE TOO ARE SO FUCKING D0PE ALONE BUT TOGETHER A FASHION POWERHOUSE!
I LOVE THEIR STYLE AND TOGETHER THE SHIT IS CRAZY!
I CANT SPEAK ON IT ENOUGH!

I am so Grateful!

So this weekend I was hospitalized!
I had a severe asthma attack and although people have been through it was still one of the scariest events of my life.

It gave me a a newfound apprecitation for the life of mine and those that I love in it. It reminded me not to take things like breathing normally for granted and those who matter and what is really important. Being in the hosital for 16 hours undergoing every test under the sun gave me a lot of time to contemplate on what makes me happy and what I have to to do make a difference in the world, my purpose, why does my life matter? The elephant that I felt was sitting on my chest was the loudest in the room and I listened. It told me value and love. Live each day for what it is and make the most out of everything. There is no time to wasted!
My mission is clear, I am goin to show the world why it needs Siliza Valdez!

The Clipse ft. Kanye West

Song and Video is D0pe.
Def Jammin' to it this Summer!

Ready to bring it in the fall

So the summer is going great so far becausa I have been writing something at least everyday and even more exitces to get this group piece goin with my fellow poet Binta. We are thinking about a storytellers theme and I am already jotting down ideas! Fall 09 watch out !!! I am also very excited to see my long lost love Darren next week whobisnjn the airforce and I miss him everyday!
Thank you for those who have been reading my blog and adding me on Facebook, glad to know you enjoy my writings !

Writing Session VII. Education

I raised my hand in class
The teacher kept talking, No Child left Behind
What happened to education and not dictation
We are taught to reach for the stars
but the sky is cloudy and that statement
in itself defines a limit
I say reach as far as you dream
and then some
Passion is ambition
and ambition is hope
I hope that our future children can learn to be better than me

Writing Session VI. Ambiguous

Your mask is so ambiguous
I can never tell who you are
and I'm afraid to show you who I am
But I won't turn you into an excuse
as to why I can't open anymore
Just a reason for me being smart

Writing Session V: Euphoric

"Stoop Kid"

His welcome mat read there's no home here
Just four walls that portray one
They were four reasons why he never left the nest
He was just another branch on the family tree he never agreed to grow
And home was just a glimpse of what the outside world would be
So he was content with fighting his nightmares 24/7
on a welcome mat
That stoop cradled his comfort
never birthing courage, his heart never dilated wide enough
And solitary confinement was plenty company for him
So he collected his thoughts in junk food and TV
that was Euphoric enough

Writing Session IV Barbaric

Passion wast the first to go
Losing that camp fire he had inside
that burned like the acid of a bullimic's stomach
where those butterflies died,
He was pathetic
And had a barbaric view of what is was to be man
Because it doesn't stop at bringing home the bacon
And every day I tried to count the times I heard him say he was proud
But I never got to one
Success was just that foreign to him


If only he was a hybrid of man
that way he would be only half as harmful
to my environment, hopefully the other half would just run out of battery
He is the reason for teenage heartbreak
Because the guy I like took the face of his
and my too comfortable brother
He was turning hearts to glaciers and I just wanted to melt it
B/c I'm ready for her to get tired of his games so I can show him what a Woman is
Cause despite what my father was, the only thing I see of him in me
is my amazing ability to get a good tan this summer

Writing Project Session III (Evolution)

MY CULTURE IS ON THE SPRAY PAINTED WALLS YOU CALL VANDALISM
TAGGING MINDS AND PAINTING TRAINS
WE'VE BEEN BOILING THE RECIPE FOR THE MELTING POT TOO LONG
AND NOW THE KITCHEN'S GETTING CROWDED


ETHNIC EVOLUTION IS SLAPPING THE FACES OF RACIST PREJUDICE PRICKS
WHO FROWN AT OUR FOOD THAT LOOKS SOMETHING LIKE A RETRO FASHION PHASE
BIG,COLORFUL,AND JAW DROPPING

THEY SAY IGNORANCE BREEDS FEAR AND AMERICA IS PISSING ITS PANTS
WE HAVE TAKEN THE PLACE OF THE BOOGIE MONSTERS UNDER THEIR BED
THEIR AMERICAN DREAM IS NOW A NIGHTMARE WHEN OUR BILINGUAL TONGUES
ARE AUDIBLE LIKE AN OPERS AND WE ARE MIXING UP THEIR KIDS

FOUNDED AT THE BLOOD VIALS OF OTHERS, NOW OUR MELANIN IS IN THEIRS
THE REASON SEPARATION OF RACES WILL CEASE BY 2050

UNTIL THEN WE WILL KEEP FINGER PAINTING THAT SKY
LEAVING OUR PRINTS FOR THE WORLD TO LOOK UP TO
AND THE EARTH LOOKS BACK AT IT LIKE a PROUD MOTHER
FOR MAKING HER PLANET BEAUTIFUL

Wrting Project 2

Conundrum


All she ever wanted to do was write poetry
Yet she spread her legs like wings
hoping that the heavens were in sight
Thinking that the pen was a cane
because she was crippled from mind down
but wasn't allowed to have a handicapped pass
so she was left to be misunderstood
her face couldn't speak the volumes her poetry did
That's why she never took took off that mask
She had an imagination deeper than pockets
yet sold out every day for that golden silence
A conundrum of perceptions
tried to diagnose her those ill thoughts she kept on a leash
Until the day she took them for a walk
No one was ready.

One of My favorite poems!

I fuckin love these pics! Hellz Bellz is so D0PE. I want to wear this, even though it's Summer...ha

Epidemic

The earth revolves around the sun
yet we deem ourselves invincible of night's predators
Carbon dating self destruction back to the blue prints of poets
who have always existed
because they did more than just exist
Yet we've never done more than just be
And Weak minds are lining up like chromosomes
dividing into nothing and epidemically eroding intelligence
It's spreading like butter on bread
and our youth is mentally dying
They forgot that the earth revolves around the sun
and the moon circles the earth like Saturn rings,
That lunar shadow casts around us,
and every day we walk behind it letting it lead us

So I totally tried to proclaim my love to the guy I spoke about in Airbags and I was totally rejected. This really blows.

I guess his friendship will be enough to suffice his company!
I love it too much =)

I FEEL MY GROWTH

I am growing. I feel it everyday, more and more.
My about me reads, All I want to do is grow in my poetry as much as I have as a person
And for the first time and confident that I am doing just that.
Inspiration is waking me up in the morning
and my book calls me every hour!
Finally what I have been looking for has arrived.
I will admit that I am afraid or shall I say timid
to move to performance, but in the four corners of my room
performance makes me feels good,
next is just getting it out there with no hesitation
and the courage of a lion,
I am Ready!

airbags

This is for you, you don't know who you are but my connection to you has grown.
You're not my typical guy but I think maybe that is why I am falling.
Poetry brought us together, and I fell in love with your voice.
you are proof that what we are looking for is literally right in front of us!
I'm afraid to tell you because our friendship bond has been growing and I actually have no idea if you could ever see me more than a confidant.
I want to be your poem, I want to be the one that inspires a metaphor so great, you call it your hottest line. I said I'm not going to catalyze our collision, but baby my airbags are ready for you...

He makes me want be goo enough and worthy of his space and time
all i want is to be within his space all the time,
I really want to tell you, but you have never given me a sign that you might feel the same way,Gheeeeeeeze!

Patiently Waiting ...

I'm not going to catalyze our collision, I'll just be sure to have airbags
Cause organic meetings now hide behind computer screens, typed keys, and wannabes
I have a fire inside that burns like the acid in a bulimic's stomach where butterflies died

I don't know...

....Have our voices seeping through the cracks of city sidewalks while
illuminating street lights for crosswalks, cause they listen
So step let’s step off this stoop walk into pure bliss
Where poetry is the official language, impress me with similes from your lips
And metaphors from your touch
You’re like blank page to me; I want to carve my poems on you like they do on tree trunks
As we climb our towering minds together, we’ll l be the envy of family trees
Never looking down because this love has taken us to heights before
And our hands have been parachutes catching our fears
I want us to periodically rename stars and
I would call this love intergalactic but stars eventually burn out
And I want a fire that will put hell‘s to shame,
So we shoot our consciousness and beings in and out of existence because people like us don’t exist anymore
Intellectual minds like ours have fallen on deaf ears, that's why we're unheard of
......
Lay down, as I please your thoughts with my hands
each passing finger reading the encrypted brail of your skin
encoding a message only a blind poet can read
unveiling a purity only a sinful poet can taint
Committing every artistic sin like leaving a piece of paper blank, mastering the art of Kamasutra Soothing your senses senseless until it leaves us breathless and the thought of me is forget-less

another working progress ...just the skeleton ....

The day she picked me up from school was the first time I experienced heartbreak in a million pieces, and my sanity in more
I became colorblind, All I could see was damaged rainbow begging for unicorns to exist and tears begging for this day to just be a dream
Hoping that I lost my sight at that moment
It was worse than the I took a blade to the thigh
Hurt more than than the ill thoughts that kept me alive
It was worse than playing house with papi and my older brother
Worse than her drug use
Worse than being homeless
It was the day she picked me up from school
While I was taking my test, he was testing the pain tolerance of her thick skin
Equating the number of times it would take for blood to seem out
And my test was on times tables so I knew that 1 face X 2 hands =2 bodies
3 punches x one cheek = 3 times the pain
1 man x 1 hand x 1 cheeks still = 1
and we all know the first time is really the 10th so why didn't she leave at 1
She was beaten, while i was listening to beats and writing poetry at lunch
When I saw her at 3'0 clock my insides ripped apart
the sky was falling and I wanted was not to breath
My heart was gutted and ripped and gutted and ripped and gutted and ripped ....
I have never laid eyes on woman do helpless
or shall I say an animal so helpless cause I never saw her a woman after that
plus she was beaten like one, like a little Bitch, except silent
and silence spoke poems, read pain, and illustrated a piece of shit
I have never rested my visuals on an animal so helpless
at 11 years young I witnessed a lifetime
She cuffed her palm over her cheek as if blanking a baby bird in it's nest
so gentle and soft
Her vulnerability was pathetic because I used to see her as my warrior
Her blood red lips are as vivid today as strawberries
but her speech impedement from the force
punched tears our my eyes
So when i think of pain I don't think of adolescent heartbreak
I think of my mother
Those thoughts stay on mental layaway, I have yet to buy them out

New Piece about My Papi ...just a preview, not done

Baseball was more than sport
It spelled freedom in capital letters
his travel to the U.S. was visible from left field of Boca Chica, DR
Literally not having a pot to piss in
Papi could play and he had a dream
So he took his Caribbean tan and patched gloved hands
and made it happen
With roots as dark as sugars canes
He had a sweet tooth for trouble
Growing pain and in the midst an undeniable talent
Family was more than a sport
It spelled abandonment in capital letters
And his daughter’s smile was visible from left field of his living room
Literally not having a heart to love
His calling to be a man was an alarm clocking he ignored
pressing snooze every 15 seconds to keep being a child
His body prepared a funeral
His heart was the first to go
next was his ability to know he was dying
his cognitive, Gone
Losing sight of his goals
His savage past made him blind to ethics
my body became a blind man's brail and touch was the only way he could read me
So I took my Caribbean tan and his patched gloved hands as...